The general direction of the Alps is straight up.

The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter.

heheh you made me laugh in the middle of the class dude

A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to
talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."
The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds.
He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic.
He asks the girl: "Do you like potato pancakes?" She says "No," and the silence returns.
After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list.
He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again.

The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father's advice and
asks the girl the following question:
"If you had a brother, would he like potato pancakes?"

News: 3 Chimps escaped from the zoo... 1 was caught watching tv... another playing football and the third one was caught reading this message!

God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.