:smt041

thankssssssssssssssss

Thanks...

One day a college professor of Psychology was greeting his new college class. He stood up in front of the class and said, "Would everyone who thinks he or she is stupid please stand up?"
After a minute or so of silence, a young man stood up.
"Well, good morning. So, you actually think you're a moron?" the
professor asked.
The kid replied, "No sir, I just didn't want to see you standing there all by yourself.

hhahah LOL elena that's quite hilarious))

thanks for sharing this one

here comes another one

A man whose wife was pregnant couldn't bear to be in the delivery room at the time of the birth. So he thought he'd ring up later to see if it had come yet. He rang up and the nurse said "it's a girl but there’s another one on the way" he rang again later and the nurse said "it's another girl but there's another coming" he rang once more and the nurse said " it's a boy but there's another coming". He couldn't stand it any more so he went to the pub and got drunk. An hour later he was really nervous. He was dialing the hospital, hands shaking, and accidentally dialed the sports line. He asked " how many did we get
mate" the person said "198 all out.... and the last one was a duck"

A biology teacher wished to demonstrate to his students the harmful effects of alcohol on living organisms. For his experiment, he showed them a beaker with pond water in which there was a thriving civilization of worms. When he added some alcohol into the beaker the worms doubled-up and died.
"Now," he said," what do you learn from this?"
An eager student gave his answer.
"Well the answer is obvious," he said " if you drink alcohol, you'll
never have worms."

- Mum? Daddy is drunk again!
- How do you know?
- He shaves the mirror from bathroom!
............................................................................................

Two snakes were going on their road and the little one says to his friend:
- Ben, I want to tell you something!
- Wait until we will get home!
The little snake insists:
- Ben, I really have to tell you something.
Ben again tells him : Wait dude until we will get home.
But the little snake insists more and more,... bored Ben says:
- Ok, say what you have to say.
- Well... are we venomous?
- Yes, why?
- Wow... oops...I just bit my tongue.

A rabbit goes to the pharmacy and asks:
- Do you have drugs?
- No, we don't.
Th next day again: Do you have drugs?
- No we don't.
So every day for 4 weeks the rabbit goes to the pharmacy and asks the same question and receive the same answer. Finally the pharmacy decides to bring drugs for the rabbit.
The forth day the rabbit goes to the pharmacy:
- Do you have drugs?
- Yes we have drugs.
- Hey, police... cops... these people from here sell drugs.
........................................................................................

- Doctor... my husband speaks while he is sleeping.
- Well, I am sorry Mrs. but there is no medicine to make him hush.
- But I do not want him to hush, I just want to make him talk clearer, to be able to understand what he is talking.
........................................................................................................

- Doctor, is it true that if I eat more carrots I will see better?
- Are you still doubting? Have you ever saw a rabbit with eyeglasses?